Since the time I was a kid, I’ve always wanted to find the right person. I guess my mom’s love for love stories was passed down to me too. When I’d watch movies, I’d always think about how nice it would be when I finally find her. I remember thinking that falling in love with someone and then having them by your side was something that happened to everyone when they became of a certain age.
I was also always a person who loved nice people. If someone was nice to people around them unreasonably, I’d like them and want to become friends with them. I thought people like that were very cool. As a kid, I always seemed to have found the right friends. I miss that because making friends wasn’t a very big procedure back then. Everyone was legit, everyone showed who they exactly were, people were transparent. Perhaps because we were kids.
When I would finally become friends with them, I’d always talk to them. I’d get attached to them and once I get attached to someone, my world revolves around them. I’m still like that, though, things are much harder now. Making friends isn’t the two-minute thing it used to be. Now, I need to spend time with people, find out if they are who they’re showing they are. Then I need to spend still more time with them just to verify whether or not I’ve been mistaken. Still, though, I’ve ended up with the worst kinds of people.
I never really understood what love was until very recently. I used to think to myself, “How exactly am I supposed to know that I love someone?”. I really couldn’t understand. I was with someone I liked and enjoyed my time with them. So when was I going to fall in love with them? Was it when they came running to me in slow motion? Was it when they hugged me tight like they would never let go? Was it when we kissed like they did in the movies? Somehow, I never understood that I had already found love.
Love was just that. Having someone around you who you could spend all your time with and not get bored and never feel like you’re boring them, having someone who can you understand and someone who understands you, having someone who would stay with you through thick and thin and someone who you would do that for no questions asked, someone who could trust with anything and someone whose trust you would keep even if you didn’t have to promise it.
The thing about love is, you can give it freely to whomever you wish. There are a few people who I love more than anything in the world. I’m so attached to them that if they get hurt, I do, too. When they’re not in the right mood, I can tell. But it hurts when they don’t reciprocate. When you give your all to someone and they give you nothing back, something inside you breaks. The main problem with it is, love gives you a lot of hope. No matter what happens, you’ll still love them. You’ll still tell yourself that everything will be okay and you always show yourself that silver lining even if there ain’t any.
Sometimes, it’s necessary to tell yourself that things have gone wrong and they will never be right. It’s better to get away from things that hurt you. It will be hard. It will be painful but once you’re out, trust me, things will be much better than they are. Love is like a drug. You get addicted to it and don’t want to let go. When you get out, you want in again. Fortunately, for us, it’s the kind of drug that if used correctly can be very beneficial to us. So look for the right kind! Whatever kind is hurting you definitely isn’t meant for you. You will find the right one.
Thank you for reading!